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Best Old Lady Jokes

After my last golfer and Kate Upton post, I thought of doing something different. And so today’s post is about the best old lady jokes.

A Collection Of Best Old Lady Jokes

An old lady sitting on her porch, rocking away the last days of her long life, was surprised when suddenly, a fairy godmother appears and informs her she can have three wishes.

best old lady jokes

”Well, now,” says the old lady, ”I guess I would like to be rich.”

*** POOF *** Her rocking chair turns to solid gold.

”And, gee, I guess I wouldn’t mind being a young, beautiful woman.”

*** POOF *** She turns into a beautiful young woman.

”Your third wish?” asks the fairy godmother, just as the old woman’s cat wanders across the porch in front of them. ”Ooh – can you change him into a handsome young stud?” she asks.

With a wave of her wand the cat changed into a young man, more handsome than anyone could imagine. She stares at him, smitten. With a smile that makes her knees weak, he saunters across the porch and whispers in her ear, ”I bet you’re sorry you had me neutered.”

With Age Comes Wisdom Old Lady Jokes

One day an older woman walked into a shop and got some dog food. As she went to pay for it, the cashier said, “you can’t buy that dog food until you provide evidence that you have a dog.” So she brought in her dog, and she got the dog food.

The next day the same old lady went to get some cat food, and the cashier said, “you can’t have that cat food. We need evidence that you have a cat!” So she went home and got her cat, and she got the cat food.

The next day the same old lady went in again, and she had a paper bag. She told the cashier to put her finger in it, which she did. The cashier said it felt warm and soft; “now that you’re satisfied, can I have some toilet paper, please!>

This joke goes to prove you don’t want to piss off the elderly.

Looking For More Laughs? Check These Out!

Check out my funny Little Johnny At Grandma’s House. My funny nutrition joke video has a twist to it. See if you can work it out?

While there, check out my Laughaholics Playlist which is crammed packed full of funny jokes. There, you will find my top funny blonde jokes and my top 10 funniest blonde jokes video, which has over 10,000 views. As you know, I’m always looking for new subscribers, so why not consider subscribing to my My Bonzer Channel.